by Nischala Joy Devi.
May 23, 2014.
We humans cause ourselves so many problems by expecting that life and our relationships should always be on the upswing without, then, swinging in the opposite direction. In fact, our lives and even the most loving relationships are filled with highs and lows.
Continually striving for the highs in life, we will probably find that they elude us, and we will feel compelled to climb to steeper and steeper plateaus. We enjoy the thrill of the highest mountain, but dislike roaming around in the endless valleys below. Instead of this, we should seek the endless plane of harmony.
Having been a monk and a spiritual minister for many years, I find that one of the joys of this vocation is presiding over weddings. On that magical day, each pledges love and dedication to the other. My heart never fails to delight in the splendor of love.
For a growing majority of couples, something changes after the earnestness of the vows. On their wedding day, they’ve promised to cling to each other for richer or for poorer, in sickness and in health, forsaking all others. Fast forward several years, and the same two lovebirds have turned into birds of prey. They stand together not at a spiritual altar, but at the bar of a court of law. The passion that once fanned the flames of love now swirls the fire of animosity, fueled by wounded feelings and accusations. I often wonder, “What could have caused such a dramatic change?”
If we are used to extremes, we may find ourselves bored when balance and calm come to prevail. When falling in love, at the peak of great passion, it is difficult to remember that there is a valley deep below. Instead of scaling the peaks only to fly off a cliff, ride the peaceful, rolling hills. A balanced relationship promotes growth and liberation for all involved.